The art of giving has been mastered by a lot of people for a lot of reasons. For example, some do it as a form of studied ritual, others because they genuinely feel bad for those not as privileged or fortunate as themselves, and yet others because of remorse, responsibility or guilt.
But the question is how do people who give feel after their act of giving? Or to put it another way, how should one feel after one has given something which belonged to them to someone else forever?
Everybody knows that it’s considered pretty crass to crow about it so most people don’t go around advertising the act, although a lot of us would like to. On the other hand everyone also knows that secretly we all tend to feel good afterwards — even it’s only a fleeting mechanical feeling of mission accomplished.
Yet the wise remind us that we really ought to feel nothing: nishkama karma — action without attachment.
At the same time consider Ekalavya who had unhesitatingly cut off his thumb and given it to his guru Dronacharya as dakshina or offering, thereby ruining his chance to become the greatest archer in the world.
It’s said that on his deathbed he was asked if he had any regrets to which he replied that yes he had indeed regretted the act only once in his entire life.
That apparently was when the Pandavas were coming to kill Dronacharya who had laid down his arms on hearing the false news of his son’s death. “If the thumb was there,” he said, “no one could have dared hurt my Guru.”
And there it is, something arguably at least at par with nishkama karma – regret without any regret at giving something.
(This piece first appeared in The Economic Times)